One Shop Stop for Blocking Abuse?

I was asked yesterday evening – “what is the one single step we could take to stop the abuse of children?” The question came at the end of my interview with Randall deWitt of radio station KORNQ107, broadcasting out of Mitchell, South Dakota, USA. It is an impossible question to answer, unless you believe in waving magic wands.

I have visited many schools and organisations where they are on top of this issue. They have learned from experts that the best defence against abuse is to stop evil doers gaining access to their young people. Fundamental to their defences is the acceptance by all staff that ‘it could happen here’. That leads to alertness in looking out for signs of abuse. Being alert pays off when members of the community are taught what signs to look out for. In these top institutions, young people know how to protect themselves against the manipulative skills of perpetrators. An atmosphere of good relationships in the organisation encourages the victims to come forward with the confidence that they will be heard. The leaders of the organisation show they listen, take swift, positive action following disclosures, with high priority being given to supporting the victim. When weighing the name of the institution against righting the wrong done to the victim there is no contest. Support for the victim comes first every time.

In my book, The Devil to Pay, about a group of boys growing up in Ireland, towards the end of the second world war, I identified some of the issues that allow this evil to creep into the boy’s community.

Violence is accepted in their community as a good way of moulding young boys to be obedient, respectable, God-fearing people. Wanton violence hides under the disguise of discipline. It is a short step from accepted camouflaged violence to sexual abuse.

The boys regard lesser acts of sexual abuse as normal actions of adults and teachers. “Brother Jerome hit us only when we deserved it … (so) we tolerated his habit of rubbing our necks and embracing us for the slightest reason”. Paul remarks he can collect free medicine if he allows the chemist “put his hand inside my trousers”.

Forjot accepts he can’t tell his grandmother about his uncle’s sexual abuse, “It would upset her too much. He is her son. I am only her bastard grandson” When the sacristan tells the parish priest about the curate’s sexual activities with young boys he decides to keep quiet when he is threatened: “I had to think that if I spoke out I’d lose me house and me bit to eat and would never have finished up waiting to die in such a lovely place as this”.

At the end of the book the three surviving boys meet and agree that if anything happens to the other two, “the last one left should speak out about those times when abuse was made to look normal”.

The Oscar award winning best film, Spotlight, shows how difficult it was for the Boston Globe to convince their readers about abuse that had been made to look normal. Would you believe horrendous accounts about someone you know? Would you know what to do?

In my answer, I changed Randall’s question. If I was to pick one step that would be the best starting point in arming an organisation to protect its vulnerable, it would be – develop the attitude that ‘it could happen here’. When you accept that fact, you have laid the foundation for defending your young and vulnerable.